I'm not in the best mood right now, so naturally all I can think about are things that drive me crazy. So, I made a list:
(This is in no particular order.)
1. When your phone randomly decides not to vibrate and you miss a call.
The point of "vibrate mode" on a cell phone is to alert you to calls, or texts, or alarms, etc. without the total disruption that ringtones cause. If I wanted complete silence I would put my phone on "silent." Enough with the shenanigans, phone.
2. Cars that are so tiny, they cause the illusion that there is in fact an empty parking spot across the lot, so you race fours rows down only to be disappointed by the mini vehicle that was hiding between the Ford Explorer and the Mustang.
Oh, and that ONE remaining spot that you passed up in the back? Yeah, someone just took it.
3. While I'm on the subject of cars, let's talk about cars that, from a distance, resemble a police car.
You're driving down the highway...erm, speeding down the highway... and suddenly in your rear view mirror you see a cop coming up behind you. Or wait. "Is it a cop? Or just a car with a bike rack? Should I slow down? Maybe I should slow down. Maybe I should slide over into the far right lane until the cop passes me." Nope. Not a cop. And now you're stuck behind Driving Miss Daisy in the far right lane until all the people that are going a reasonable speed pass you by.
4. Allergies.
If I have to explain to you why allergies bother me, then you make me want to punch babies as well.
5. People who say, "I'm going to THE Olive Garden for dinner."
This is a chain restaurant, people. Not a fancy dining establishment. Oh, and there is no such thing as Santa Clause either.
6. When you just want one paperclip, but somehow they are ALL tangled together.
Who is doing this to the paperclips of the world???? It's like when you lay your headphones on your desk and then go to use them again and magically they are in a giant, military-grade knot. HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN?
7. Being left-handed.
Let's set aside the fact that I have to buy special scissors and when I stuff envelopes at work I have to do everything backwards. What ticks me off the most is the dreaded smearing of any pen, pencil, or marker that happens as the side of my hand drags across the paper. Ink stains on the side of the hand is sooo attractive let me tell ya.
8. Waking up mere minutes before my alarm goes off.
Anything inside of the 5 minute range just irks me to no end. That's 5 extra minutes of sleep I could have enjoyed!!
9. When the bottoms of pants get stuck inside the tongues of shoes.
I've stopped random strangers before to ask them to fix their pant legs. I'm not kidding. And just so you know, if you are guilty of doing this, especially with some Timberlands on, it does not give you "swagga." It merely stamps "douchebag" on your forehead.
10. SUPER SLOW INTERNET.
I pay an exorbitant amount of money to attend this school, so dammit I expect my YouTube and Hulu videos to buffer at a speed that is reasonable!! If I have time to run to the library and print something out as a page is loading, then something is seriously wrong.
***Note: Of course, I would never ACTUALLY strike an infant. It's just an expression people. Don't freak out.
Friday, April 23, 2010
Monday, April 5, 2010
'Tis the season of Bambi.
It has come to my attention that some people are actually taking the time to casually scan what I have to say on here. First of all: stop procrastinating and do your homework folks. Secondly: thanks for the support.
I am by no means under the impression that the thoughts that bounce around in my mind are of any consequence to anyone else in the world, so the idea that they are mildly interesting to someone makes me feel good.
On that note, I do have some semi-coherent thoughts about this long-awaited phenomenon we call Spring:
I find it fascinating that things as simple as flip flops and a little bit of sunshine completely alter the moods of the human population. I’ll admit that I fall under this statistic most definitely. You may not be able to tell, but that’s just because the amount of sunshine outside is directly proportional to the amount of time I sit in the semi-darkness of my dorm room, but that’s just because I prefer the natural light coming through my window to the harsh fluorescents of the ceiling lights, even if that means I look like a vampire from time to time.
Sunglasses. That word also always makes me smile and with Spring comes the increased use of sunglasses as well as flip flops which really are the best thing since sliced bread just ask a scientist. I have and he agrees.
Ok, I lied just then, but I still stand by my statement. Another thing Spring has going for it is warmer weather of course, and that means driving with the windows down, which also causes smiling. Of course that could be because the wind is berating your face, and the g-force is forcing you to smile, but it’s whatever.
Ok, I think I have reached rambling status, so I’m just going to sum this up: Spring is awesome. Except allergies and rain of course. Now I just need to get a tan…
Oh, by the way, I had to go to work in the middle of writing this and I just have to let everyone know that at work I filed a folder for someone named Buttons Bows Jackson. I wish more than anything in the world that I was kidding. So, I just want to throw a shout-out to Buttons. If you ever read this…and you need to talk…about anything…which I’m sure you do…I’m here for you buddy.
I am by no means under the impression that the thoughts that bounce around in my mind are of any consequence to anyone else in the world, so the idea that they are mildly interesting to someone makes me feel good.
On that note, I do have some semi-coherent thoughts about this long-awaited phenomenon we call Spring:
I find it fascinating that things as simple as flip flops and a little bit of sunshine completely alter the moods of the human population. I’ll admit that I fall under this statistic most definitely. You may not be able to tell, but that’s just because the amount of sunshine outside is directly proportional to the amount of time I sit in the semi-darkness of my dorm room, but that’s just because I prefer the natural light coming through my window to the harsh fluorescents of the ceiling lights, even if that means I look like a vampire from time to time.
Sunglasses. That word also always makes me smile and with Spring comes the increased use of sunglasses as well as flip flops which really are the best thing since sliced bread just ask a scientist. I have and he agrees.
Ok, I lied just then, but I still stand by my statement. Another thing Spring has going for it is warmer weather of course, and that means driving with the windows down, which also causes smiling. Of course that could be because the wind is berating your face, and the g-force is forcing you to smile, but it’s whatever.
Ok, I think I have reached rambling status, so I’m just going to sum this up: Spring is awesome. Except allergies and rain of course. Now I just need to get a tan…
Oh, by the way, I had to go to work in the middle of writing this and I just have to let everyone know that at work I filed a folder for someone named Buttons Bows Jackson. I wish more than anything in the world that I was kidding. So, I just want to throw a shout-out to Buttons. If you ever read this…and you need to talk…about anything…which I’m sure you do…I’m here for you buddy.
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